Love is probably the best antidepressant there is because one of the most common sources of depression is feeling unloved. Most depressed people don’t love themselves and they do not feel loved by others. They also are very self-focused, making them less attractive to others and depriving them of opportunities to learn the skills of love. There is a mythology in our culture that love just happens. As a result, the depressed often sit around passively waiting for someone to love them. But love doesn’t work that way. To get love and keep love you have to go out and be active and learn a variety of specific skills.
Most of us get our ideas of love from popular culture. We come to believe that love is something that sweeps us off our feet. But the pop-culture ideal of love consists of unrealistic images created for entertainment, which is one reason so many of us are set up to be depressed. It’s part of our national vulnerability, like eating junk food, constantly stimulated by images of instant gratification. We think it is love when it’s simply distraction and infatuation. One consequence is that when we hit real love we become upset and disappointed because there are many things that do not fit the cultural ideal.
Limerance is the psychological state of deep infatuation. It feels good but rarely lasts. Limerance is that first stage of mad attraction whereby all the hormones are flowing and things feel so right. Limerance lasts, on average, six months. It can progress to love. Love mostly starts out as limerance, but limerance doesn’t always evolve into love.
Love is a learned skill, not something that comes from hormones or emotion particularly. Erich Fromm called it "an act of will. " If you don’t learn the skills of love you virtually guarantee that you will be depressed, not only because you will not be connected enough, but because you will have many failure experiences.
There are always core differences between two people, no matter how good or close you are, and if the relationship is going right those differences surface. The issue then is to identify the differences and negotiate them so that they don’t distance you or kill the relationship. You do that by understanding where the other person is coming from, who that person is, and by being able to represent yourself. When the differences are known you must be able to negotiate and compromise on them until you find a common ground that works for both.
Erich Fromm called love "an act of will" because______.

A:you have to wait to get love B:love is something you can get when you want C:love is a skill you have to learn D:you can only get love after many failures

Tight-lipped elders used to say," It’’s not what you want in this world, but what you get."   Psychology teaches that you do get what you want if you know what you want and want the right things.   You can make a mental blueprint of a desire as you would make a blueprint of a house, and each of us is continually making these blueprints in the general routine of everyday living. If we intend to have friends to dinner, we plan the menu, make a shopping list, decide which food to cook first, and such planning is an essential for any type of meal to be served.   Likewise, if you want to find a job, take a sheet of paper, and write a brief account of yourself. In making a blueprint for a job, begin with yourself, for when you know exactly what you have to offer, you can intelligently plan where to sell your services.   This account of yourself is actually a sketch of your working life and should include education, experience and references. Such an account is valuable. It can be referred to in filling out standard application blanks and is extremely helpful in personal interviews. While talking to you ,your could-be employer is deciding whether your education, your experience, and other qualifications, will pay him to employ you and your" wares" and abilities must be displayed in an orderly and reasonably connected manner.   When you have carefully prepared a blueprint of your abilities and desires, you have something tangible to sell. Then you are ready to hunt for a job. Get all the possible information about your could be job. Make inquiries as to the details regarding the job and the firm. Keep your eyes and ears open, and use your own judgement. Spend a certain amount of time each day seeking the employment you wish for, and keep in mind: Securing a job is your job now. What do the elders mean when they say, "It’’s not what you want in this world, but what you get. "

A:You’’ll certainly get what you want. B:It’’s no use dreaming. C:You should be dissatisfied with what you have. D:It’’s essential to set a goal for yourself.

Tight-lipped elders used to say," It’’s not what you want in this world, but what you get."   Psychology teaches that you do get what you want if you know what you want and want the right things.   You can make a mental blueprint of a desire as you would make a blueprint of a house, and each of us is continually making these blueprints in the general routine of everyday living. If we intend to have friends to dinner, we plan the menu, make a shopping list, decide which food to cook first, and such planning is an essential for any type of meal to be served.   Likewise, if you want to find a job, take a sheet of paper, and write a brief account of yourself. In making a blueprint for a job, begin with yourself, for when you know exactly what you have to offer, you can intelligently plan where to sell your services.   This account of yourself is actually a sketch of your working life and should include education, experience and references. Such an account is valuable. It can be referred to in filling out standard application blanks and is extremely helpful in personal interviews. While talking to you ,your could-be employer is deciding whether your education, your experience, and other qualifications, will pay him to employ you and your" wares" and abilities must be displayed in an orderly and reasonably connected manner.   When you have carefully prepared a blueprint of your abilities and desires, you have something tangible to sell. Then you are ready to hunt for a job. Get all the possible information about your could be job. Make inquiries as to the details regarding the job and the firm. Keep your eyes and ears open, and use your own judgement. Spend a certain amount of time each day seeking the employment you wish for, and keep in mind: Securing a job is your job now. What do the elders mean when they say, "It’’s not what you want in this world, but what you get. "

A:You’’ll certainly get what you want. B:It’’s no use dreaming. C:You should be dissatisfied with what you have. D:It’’s essential to set a goal for yourself.

Tight-lipped elders used to say," It’’s not what you want in this world, but what you get."   Psychology teaches that you do get what you want if you know what you want and want the right things.   You can make a mental blueprint of a desire as you would make a blueprint of a house, and each of us is continually making these blueprints in the general routine of everyday living. If we intend to have friends to dinner, we plan the menu, make a shopping list, decide which food to cook first, and such planning is an essential for any type of meal to be served.   Likewise, if you want to find a job, take a sheet of paper, and write a brief account of yourself. In making a blueprint for a job, begin with yourself, for when you know exactly what you have to offer, you can intelligently plan where to sell your services.   This account of yourself is actually a sketch of your working life and should include education, experience and references. Such an account is valuable. It can be referred to in filling out standard application blanks and is extremely helpful in personal interviews. While talking to you ,your could-be employer is deciding whether your education, your experience, and other qualifications, will pay him to employ you and your" wares" and abilities must be displayed in an orderly and reasonably connected manner.   When you have carefully prepared a blueprint of your abilities and desires, you have something tangible to sell. Then you are ready to hunt for a job. Get all the possible information about your could be job. Make inquiries as to the details regarding the job and the firm. Keep your eyes and ears open, and use your own judgement. Spend a certain amount of time each day seeking the employment you wish for, and keep in mind: Securing a job is your job now. What do the elders mean when they say, "It’’s not what you want in this world, but what you get. "

A:You’’ll certainly get what you want. B:It’’s no use dreaming. C:You should be dissatisfied with what you have. D:It’’s essential to set a goal for yourself.

Tight-lipped elders used to say," It’s not what you want in this world, but what you get."   Psychology teaches that you do get what you want if you know what you want and want the right things.   You can make a mental blueprint of a desire as you would make a blueprint of a house, and each of us is continually making these blueprints in the general routine of everyday living. If we intend to have friends to dinner, we plan the menu, make a shopping list, decide which food to cook first, and such planning is an essential for any type of meal to be served.   Likewise, if you want to find a job, take a sheet of paper, and write a brief account of yourself. In making a blueprint for a job, begin with yourself, for when you know exactly what you have to offer, you can intelligently plan where to sell your services.   This account of yourself is actually a sketch of your working life and should include education, experience and references. Such an account is valuable. It can be referred to in filling out standard application blanks and is extremely helpful in personal interviews. While talking to you ,your could-be employer is deciding whether your education, your experience, and other qualifications, will pay him to employ you and your" wares" and abilities must be displayed in an orderly and reasonably connected manner.   When you have carefully prepared a blueprint of your abilities and desires, you have something tangible to sell. Then you are ready to hunt for a job. Get all the possible information about your could be job. Make inquiries as to the details regarding the job and the firm. Keep your eyes and ears open, and use your own judgement. Spend a certain amount of time each day seeking the employment you wish for, and keep in mind: Securing a job is your job now. What do the elders mean when they say, "It’’s not what you want in this world, but what you get. "

A:You’’ll certainly get what you want. B:It’’s no use dreaming. C:You should be dissatisfied with what you have. D:It’’s essential to set a goal for yourself.

If you want ( ), you have to get the fund somewhere.

A:the job done B:the job to do C:the job to have done D:the job that is done

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